Clumsy melodies

Tired.
More spiritually at this point.
Bank in the negative.
Still.
Burdening loved ones for places to stay,
Should've got a trade,
Should've done it years ago,
Before the dream started to suffocate.
Miss my woman.
Prospects on the operating table.
Get that patient in here stat!
Use what light there is left,
This one's caught a rare disease called Dreams & Principles,
As though they weren't for the sacrificial altar.
Or people with wealth.
At least that's the way it seems.
Tonight is ripe to break the sobriety streak but,
Of course,
That would be weak and,
Of course,
I'm cranky.
Carpal tunnel vision.
Hands set in concrete,
Raging like a dumpster fire.
But there's still enough light left in them
To search for clumsy melodies in the silence,
​Light in the shadows.